Monday, June 18, 2012

A Prayer for Daz

For my wife, my love, and for my children, here is a prayer-poem written not by a stranger, but by Daddy, just for our Little Man.

For Dastan

Alrighty Almighty, you got my kid. I don't know if you took him, or if he came of his own free will, or if you needed him, or if this was just one of those suck-parts that come with life, but he's there and I'm here, and you're gonna have to get a few things straight.

First off, his name is Dastan. It's not Dustin, or Datsun, or Destin. It is DASTAN.

I know, it's a Persian name. To make it more complicated, we added two German names: Jerome Wheeler.

And to top it off, his last name is TRANT. Not Trent or Tramp. TRANT.

I know it's complicated, and if you get it right you'll be the first. I just want to make sure you understand who you're dealing with.

Next you need to teach him a few things. Start with his colors. He was learning them at school, and best we can tell he liked the color purple the best.

Now show him how to throw the ball for the dogs. He already had a good start on that, along with tug-of-war. You have a Golden up there who is perfect for Daz (Daz is short for Dastan, God, in case you missed that).

The Golden's name is Lexi. She died of raging cancer at the age of 9. Nice one. She loves the water, and guess what, so does Dastan. Teach him to throw the ball in the lake (I assume you have lakes), and let Lexi chase it. If it isn't now, it will be Daz's favorite game. It sure was Lexi's!

Now teach him to be sweet like his momma. Teach him to play like his brother and sister.

Teach him love, Lord, now that you have him. Let his legacy be a stronger family and a better world. Give us strength, let us mourn, and every once in a while, let us feel Little Man's arms around our neck.

That was another one of his names. Little Man. Dazaster. Dazaroo. Daz. His sister made a memorial t-shirt that you can read. It has a lot more names than those.

It is true to say the little guy was everything to everyone in this family. Let him be so to you, Lord, as I know he must be, because you love no other way.

I have a beautiful family, Lord, and a beautiful baby son who is in your care. I suppose your wingspan covers us all, God, but for Daz, for our Little Man, please, please.

Just please.

Until my heart stops beating, God, it will ache for him, and mine is not the only one. Make this good, Lord, please make this good.


PS. He loved Kermit the Frog. If you haven't already, get him one. He likes to chew on the nose.

- Eric

Eric W. Trant is a published author of several short stories and the novel Out of the Great Black Nothing. He is currently represented by Debrin Case at Open Heart Publishing. See more of Eric's work here: Publications


Marie said...

Simply beautiful. And that's right it's DASTAN!! <3

DavinKwriter said...

That was amazing Eric.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Wonderful, Eric. He will take care of Dastan.

Stephanie said...

Hugs to you and your family :)

Phoenix said...

Tears are rolling down my face.

I like to imagine God's a good listener. I hope I'm right.

G Blechman said...

This brought tears to my eyes. Incredibly beautiful. I'm sure your son is happy and doing well where he is. All the best to you and your family.

~Gina Blechman

dolorah said...

A beautiful prayer Eric, for a beautiful Little Man.


Anonymous said...

Somehow I managed to moss this post the other day. As I sit in the airport to see Michelle off for her vacation I'm crying, not because she's leaving but because of you beautiful words! I think of Dastan everyday. I tell Gregory about him all the time. Xoxo to you and the family!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Wine and Words said...

You made me cry again...and I have to speak in front of 1100 people in about an hour and my makeup is all smeared. *sigh*

A wise man told me a couple weeks ago..."God knows you intimately. He knows every single thing that you try to hide, and all the crap you try to promote." I do believe Dastan could not be in better hands.

"From this moment on...
there's no fear when the night comes 'round
I'm in better hands now." - Natalie Grant

Even so, I hear your heart Eric, wanting so much still to parent, to protect, to provide.

Nate said...

Beautiful words of love and suffering spoken with personal faith and candor to the God Almighty. I love you, Eric. I wish I could carrying some of your sadness. You, Amanda, and Dastan are heroes.

T. Powell Coltrin said...

I've never read anything so beautiful and painful.

It's too hard to understand when we are left behind, but my belief is that your son is in heaven and that Little Man and Lexi are spending time with each other. There is no sorrow or tears there. Wish there weren't here.

I am wrapping my virtual arms around you and your family and praying for healing comfort.


Misha Gerrick said...

Wow this moved me to tears. Still praying for you and your family.

Jai Joshi said...

Eric, my god, I had no idea.

This moved me to tears.