tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post255852360086276481..comments2024-03-09T02:15:11.120-08:00Comments on Eric W. Trant: All right, how about a BAR SCENE!Eric W. Tranthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13842968931062056407noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-31940078775488585072010-04-11T19:42:44.934-07:002010-04-11T19:42:44.934-07:00I know this guy, I've seen him in almost every...I know this guy, I've seen him in almost every bar I've been in. In fact, a couple of times I've been the brunette turning the dude down. Wait, no I never turn down a free drink, but anyway...<br /><br />Seriously, Harold is easy to relate to and you have successfully created a character readers can identify with. The paranoia about his father stalking him is an intriguing element. Nice job!EJ Fechendahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05300369395930503020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-52575132568354623712010-04-11T19:23:42.202-07:002010-04-11T19:23:42.202-07:00Lape: Yeah, no potty break. Bladders never fill, g...Lape: Yeah, no potty break. Bladders never fill, guns never run empty. Come on, bro, you know this!<br /><br />Sarah: Harold is one of my favorite anti-heroes. I wrote 120k wds on this guy, not a one of them positive, and yet he's a freaking ace.<br /><br />Stu, Tara: Thanks! This is an entry chapter to a novel. I'm just glad it wasn't too confusing with the background noise. The guy's seeing his dead father in the form of a crow who taps his window with <i>Shave-and-a-haircut</i>. I know. I'm a weirdo, too much Stephen King.<br /><br />D: I'm Harold. Nice to meet you. Everything I wrote about him is TRUE. The bar is Fox & Hound here in Dallas, if I had to name it.<br /><br />Raquel: Thanks! I'm new to the blog-o-sphere -- if not to writing and posting online -- so encouragement help help helps!<br /><br /><br /> - EricEric W. Tranthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13842968931062056407noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-16517403944536017862010-04-11T19:13:32.187-07:002010-04-11T19:13:32.187-07:00I love all the background innuendos going on. Good...I love all the background innuendos going on. Good scene.Tarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09008153523366719973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-79539186665945260212010-04-11T15:08:36.633-07:002010-04-11T15:08:36.633-07:00Hey, I think I've met this guy at the bar some...Hey, I think I've met this guy at the bar sometime. <br /><br />This was really good, so much story here. Brings up all kinds of questions - and I like that.<br /><br />You said you've lived this scene? Wow. Maybe that's why its so vivid and real. Excellent voice, good characterization. <br /><br />Thanks for sharing this. If this is typical of the quality of writing for that closeted WIP, you need to pull it out again and dust it off. Really nice work.<br /><br />........dholedolorahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08715849844092553699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-41844931736927980262010-04-11T14:03:27.549-07:002010-04-11T14:03:27.549-07:00"God had dealt Harold Glen Murphy a sum of er..."God had dealt Harold Glen Murphy a sum of errors..." Great line. The thing with the dad tapping on the mirrors was kinda creepy too. Felt bad for him going home alone. Interesting post.Raquel Byrneshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12870113745683162915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-81913436145202631222010-04-11T11:56:47.124-07:002010-04-11T11:56:47.124-07:00I like this, with the little hints of something el...I like this, with the little hints of something else going on in the background. There's certainly plenty of characterisation.stuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16388674850920848503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-43376027052727720212010-04-11T10:43:31.553-07:002010-04-11T10:43:31.553-07:00I love the detail and the dialogue here. Really se...I love the detail and the dialogue here. Really sets the tone of the scene. And I like Harold a lot. :)sarahjayne smythehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02589820347348973092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5779183012658025206.post-46977087150921706502010-04-11T09:21:06.705-07:002010-04-11T09:21:06.705-07:00Hmm...six beer and no potty break? ;) Harold has a...Hmm...six beer and no potty break? ;) Harold has an iron bladder.<br />I loved "be the beer".<br />I think I mentioned "bar courage" in my comment on my blog...but this guy has some serious beer goggles on. The tension about what was going on with his father made the scene work for me. He has about as much game as the Rangers (sorry about yesterday...but not really).<br />Nice job!Andrew Rosenberghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09215333688753781447noreply@blogger.com